News about Jews
Date posted: July 3, 2012. Source: Anonymous e-mail.
A Jewish man was sitting in Starbucks reading an Arab newspaper. A friend of his, who happened to be in the same store, noticed this strange phenomenon. Very upset, he approached him and said: 'Moshe, have you lost your mind? Why are you reading an Arab newspaper?'
Moshe replied, 'I used to read the Jewish newspapers, but what did I find? Jews being persecuted, Israel being attacked, Jews disappearing through assimilation and intermarriage, Jews living in poverty... I got so depressed!
So I switched to the Arab newspaper. Now what do I find? Jews own all the banks, Jews control the media, Jews are all rich and powerful, Jews rule the world. The news is so much better!'
Not Kosher
Date posted: February 20, 2008. Source: Anonymous e-mail.
A Jewish man was in a supermarket in New York. He saw a black woman trying to get her young child to put down a candy bar he had picked off the shelf.
"Josiah , you put that down! It's not kosher!"
Intrigued, the young man decided to investigate.
"Excuse me, ma'am, are you Jewish?"
"No."
"So why did you say that?"
"Why? I'll tell you why. 'because I see all them Jewish mothers saying that to their kids -... and it works, so I decided to try it."
Happiness
Happiness keeps You Sweet,
Trials keep You Strong,
Sorrows keep You Human,
Failures keep You Humble,
Success keeps You Glowing,
But Only God keeps You Going!
Now go back to work.